Have you ever thought about what you would tell your teenage self if you could go back in time? I mean really — there must be a lot, right? Because there are zillions of things that I wish I had known as a teenager that I know now.
Here are some things that I wish I could tell my teenage self:
1. Don’t be so serious all the time!
I was a very serious teenager. I was serious about school, religion, and romance. And I didn’t do particularly well in either the first or the last ones, but I certainly tried. Because I was religious, I didn’t do any of those normal teenager types of things. Never got in trouble. Never partied. I just went to school, lusted after the bad boys that I couldn’t have, and went to church. Way too serious for a teenager.
2. You are beautiful!
I never believed that I was pretty when I was a teenager. I thought I was fat (I wasn’t). I thought I was ugly (I wasn’t). I thought I wasn’t popular because of my looks (I realized as an adult that I was really a bit of a snob which is more likely the reason I wasn’t popular).
I’m not really sure why I thought those things, but I wish I could have grown up with a bit more self-confidence. I think I would have tried more things if I had been more confident in myself overall.
3. Develop a habit of working out now and don’t stop
I was average weight and height when I was a teenager. I didn’t go out of my way to workout but I was active enough. But I certainly didn’t have a habit. I wish I had started the habit of being more active when I was a teenager because if you don’t start early it is so easy to stop being active as you get older.
You get a job, have a family, and pretty soon the habit that you never formed becomes important because you gain weight as you get older. Then you think about forming the habit, but it just never seems to happen. I wish I’d formed that habit when I was younger, so it wasn’t so damn difficult now.
4. Don’t start smoking
Yes, I’m a smoker (bowing my head in shame). But I wasn’t one of those teenagers that smoked. Remember — I was religious. I was one of those stupid people that got through my teen years without smoking but started when I was 20! How dumb is that? I would tell my teen self how hard it is to quit. I would tell my teenager self how crappy it feels when you can’t breathe properly and how emotionally painful it can be to try to quit and fail time and time again. It’s not great on the ego!
5. You are smart!
I never believe I was smart. I didn’t do great in school, but not horrible either. But the thing is that I never believed that I was very smart. The trouble was that I just didn’t know where my talents lay. It was all about getting A’s back then. It never occurred to me I could be smart in other ways. I kind of found out that I was smart in grade 12 when I competed in a marketing competition and got the best overall award for my grade level. But it wasn’t until I was much older that I realized that there were other ways of measuring intelligence.
6. Learn everything you can about computers!
Oh, how I wish I had stuck with my initial interest in computers! In grade 12 I took the computer programming class and I really loved it. We were programming in Basic (I think that is what it was called) but it still fascinated me. Then I found out about bulletin boards. Our school was one of the first schools to have access to email and bulletin boards where you could chat with other high school students from the province. It was very exciting!
I got the second highest mark in that class full of boys (I was one of only two girls) and the person who got the highest mark? Well, he went on to work for MICROSOFT! Yes!
Knowing how much I love computers now, I wish I had taken more computer training. Imagine where I would be!
7. You only fail if you don’t try
I was always afraid of failing. I wouldn’t try anything if I didn’t think I’d be successful at it. I especially wouldn’t try physical things. I would never have thought of trying out for a basketball team or track (even though I loved running).
I think there is just way too much emphasis put on winning in our schools. Not everyone can win and the kids that don’t win end up feeling bad. There is something to be said for playing a sport for fun or competing just to give it your all and know you did your best. Now, I like to compete — even if I’m pretty sure that I won’t win. I just want to give it my best shot and see how far I can go!
8. Don’t be in such a rush to grow up!
I couldn’t wait to be an adult (weren’t we all like that?) but I’d tell my teenage self to chill out and enjoy being a kid for a while longer. I would have enjoyed sleeping in and going for walks with friends and laughing at immature stuff.
I’m sure if I really thought about it I could come up with more, but these are the fundamental things that I think I would have had to tell myself if I could go back in time and chat with my teenage self.
I’m making up for lost time though. Each day I try to learn lessons that I didn’t learn as a teenager. Who says it’s too late. I might be 50 years old but I’m using my brain, laughing, and trying not to take life too seriously.
What about you? What would you say? What would wisdom that you have now would your teenage self have benefited from?
